Post by Tyler Keenan on Sept 20, 2016 16:50:27 GMT
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He couldn't believe it.
Even now, after giving himself so much time and so much effort to make himself believe it, Tyler still could not believe anything that had just happened, everything that had transpired over the last week or so. He had thought that when he signed for EOW, things would be different. He would be walking into a whole new company with a completely different roster, with nobody there to recognize him or know him for his past deeds. He would have a completely new, completely fresh slate with no one to trouble him for the things that he had once done.
It seemed that was too much to ask f0r.
Sitting cross-legged on the end of his bed, Tyler sighed and looked down. Holding his iPhone in his hand, Tyler stared at the picture of Evie and himself that he used as his background, sighing happily as he remembered the times that had once been.
At the start of the year, things had been different. He had been happy, he was pleased and he was comfortably in a relationship which he had no reason to get out of. For the first time, Tyler could say that he was content with the way that his life had been going. He loved his girlfriend and she loved him back, they did things that couples did and barely had any squabbles or rows about petty subjects.
That was before he started to drink.
When things started to spiral down, Tyler could not control himself. The entire time he believed that he was in control, that he could stop having a drink whenever he wanted to. The confidence that he had become known for, the arrogance and the egotism, had become his very own worst enemy. He did not have the stomach to admit that he needed help, when it was the truth that he desperately did. The confident, egotistical rich boy that he was made him unable to say the words that admitted that he needed help.
But when things got tough, he watched as his girlfriend left him and walked out of the door. That was when he made the decision that things would be different. He hated the fact that he had been dumped, the fact that a man like him had been the one to be thrown to the curb. It hurt his pride, the one thing that made Tyler into the man he was.
And when Tyler's pride was damaged, he became a rabid animal seeking revenge.
In a way, the break-up had actually been the thing that forced him to repair himself and become better. It made him realize that he had made a mistake, it forced him to know that he had made a mistake, that he needed to do what he could to get himself back on his feet and become the man that he had once been. He would dig the confident, egotistical Tyler Keenan out of the grave and throw the depressed, self-loathing Tyler down into the dirt instead.
He would never let his desire for wrestling, his desire to be the best get in his way anymore.
So Tyler went to rehab, he managed to beat his addiction and replaced it with the will to succeed and a habit of becoming a gym freak. Obsessed with becoming better, he ate better, went to the gym regularly and replaced his dirty habits like drinking alcohol and sometimes smoking with things like chewing gum. He felt himself becoming better, in both body and soul, and he became a better man for it.
So when the modelling contracts came to light, it disgusted him to find that he was sharing a magazine with his ex-girlfriend.
It made him sick to his stomach. She had broken up with him, kicked him to the curb and then used his money to get herself sorted, back on her own two feet and then set herself up with a modelling contract. It did not work that way. It would never work that way. Tyler would never let her become better than him, oh no. Tyler would be the one that came out on top because no matter what had happened in his life, he had always come out on top.
He was a winner, through and through.
But when it came to picking up the phone, scrolling down to her number and calling, Tyler could not do it. He could not live up to what he said he would do. There was a sickly feeling in his stomach, a knot in his throat, that prevented him from doing anything. He could not face his only failure, his only mistake, he could not talk to the woman that he had failed.
Because deep down, past the confidence and the bravado, it was true. He had failed her.
Tyler knew that he had promised her that he would be for her, and he had left her in the exact same place she had been running from. He had become another part of her hatred, the alcoholism that plagued her family had haunted him as well.
And she had left him because of it.
So when she turned up out of the blue to wrestle once again, the same way that he had done, he treated her with contempt because he could not treat her with love and kindness. He was too confident to admit his mistakes, he could not do that. Swallowing his pride was too hard.
And so, with a large sigh, he deleted the photo and stared ahead.
If she still loved him, she'd tell him.
And Tyler knew that.
Even now, after giving himself so much time and so much effort to make himself believe it, Tyler still could not believe anything that had just happened, everything that had transpired over the last week or so. He had thought that when he signed for EOW, things would be different. He would be walking into a whole new company with a completely different roster, with nobody there to recognize him or know him for his past deeds. He would have a completely new, completely fresh slate with no one to trouble him for the things that he had once done.
It seemed that was too much to ask f0r.
Sitting cross-legged on the end of his bed, Tyler sighed and looked down. Holding his iPhone in his hand, Tyler stared at the picture of Evie and himself that he used as his background, sighing happily as he remembered the times that had once been.
At the start of the year, things had been different. He had been happy, he was pleased and he was comfortably in a relationship which he had no reason to get out of. For the first time, Tyler could say that he was content with the way that his life had been going. He loved his girlfriend and she loved him back, they did things that couples did and barely had any squabbles or rows about petty subjects.
That was before he started to drink.
When things started to spiral down, Tyler could not control himself. The entire time he believed that he was in control, that he could stop having a drink whenever he wanted to. The confidence that he had become known for, the arrogance and the egotism, had become his very own worst enemy. He did not have the stomach to admit that he needed help, when it was the truth that he desperately did. The confident, egotistical rich boy that he was made him unable to say the words that admitted that he needed help.
But when things got tough, he watched as his girlfriend left him and walked out of the door. That was when he made the decision that things would be different. He hated the fact that he had been dumped, the fact that a man like him had been the one to be thrown to the curb. It hurt his pride, the one thing that made Tyler into the man he was.
And when Tyler's pride was damaged, he became a rabid animal seeking revenge.
In a way, the break-up had actually been the thing that forced him to repair himself and become better. It made him realize that he had made a mistake, it forced him to know that he had made a mistake, that he needed to do what he could to get himself back on his feet and become the man that he had once been. He would dig the confident, egotistical Tyler Keenan out of the grave and throw the depressed, self-loathing Tyler down into the dirt instead.
He would never let his desire for wrestling, his desire to be the best get in his way anymore.
So Tyler went to rehab, he managed to beat his addiction and replaced it with the will to succeed and a habit of becoming a gym freak. Obsessed with becoming better, he ate better, went to the gym regularly and replaced his dirty habits like drinking alcohol and sometimes smoking with things like chewing gum. He felt himself becoming better, in both body and soul, and he became a better man for it.
So when the modelling contracts came to light, it disgusted him to find that he was sharing a magazine with his ex-girlfriend.
It made him sick to his stomach. She had broken up with him, kicked him to the curb and then used his money to get herself sorted, back on her own two feet and then set herself up with a modelling contract. It did not work that way. It would never work that way. Tyler would never let her become better than him, oh no. Tyler would be the one that came out on top because no matter what had happened in his life, he had always come out on top.
He was a winner, through and through.
But when it came to picking up the phone, scrolling down to her number and calling, Tyler could not do it. He could not live up to what he said he would do. There was a sickly feeling in his stomach, a knot in his throat, that prevented him from doing anything. He could not face his only failure, his only mistake, he could not talk to the woman that he had failed.
Because deep down, past the confidence and the bravado, it was true. He had failed her.
Tyler knew that he had promised her that he would be for her, and he had left her in the exact same place she had been running from. He had become another part of her hatred, the alcoholism that plagued her family had haunted him as well.
And she had left him because of it.
So when she turned up out of the blue to wrestle once again, the same way that he had done, he treated her with contempt because he could not treat her with love and kindness. He was too confident to admit his mistakes, he could not do that. Swallowing his pride was too hard.
And so, with a large sigh, he deleted the photo and stared ahead.
If she still loved him, she'd tell him.
And Tyler knew that.
