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Post by Jason Kaine on Sept 10, 2016 7:31:39 GMT
Haven't put that much in a rp in a long time. Would really appreciate some feedback. Thanks!
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Post by Ernie Parker on Sept 19, 2016 20:19:51 GMT
I don't really have much specific feedback for you regarding the Victory promo, but I'm sure Leila will have feedback if you reach out to her.
What I do want to feedback on is the character development piece that explains the change of attitude and look of the character. Really well done on it. I think it's always a bold move to change a character but kudos to you for jumping in and giving it a go. Personally I think you're doing the right thing and I like that you used Roxxanne as the catalyst for the changes. I believed most of it, right up until he cursed her for nearly costing him his hand. At that point I would have possibly gone a different direction. It's evident that he's clearly hurting from her departure (which I think anyone who's gone through a break up can relate to and feel from reading the piece); that part was superb. I'd have carried down that route and played to the realistic elements of what a break up can do to a person - particularly a marriage.
You've got a golden opportunity to really turn Kaine into a deep, dark, tortured soul while simultaneously avoiding the cliche or - at times - the slapstick elements of a violent character. I really hope you do that because if so, you'll have a genuine fan in me.
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